A ton of you have seen this video...
But I never posted anything about the show really.
So, three years after this miserable show, I've decided to just give some back story.
Why, you might ask?
Well, it's the probably most popular video on youtube of me and I'm constantly forced to be reminded of it all, but, like how much I despise the whole "Nintendocore" fad and the people involved with making it worse, I've never felt compelled to address it because it never feels worth my time.
I figured that I might as well do it now.
I have nothing I feel compelled to work on, it's a funny video that brings me endless shame, and it's really popular (at least, popular for where I am on the popularity spectrum)
So let's answer all of the burning questions:
Why am I just standing there? Why is the audio not matched with the video? Why am I wearing all green? Why am I so miserable and absent minded looking? Why is this video so popular?...
...actually, I can't answer the last one...
So, now that I've roped you in with the inferred promise of scandal and revelation, what did happen almost exactly 3 years ago today?
A very bad show
....
....
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...I guess I'll elaborate more....
Earlier in the month (March of 07,) a friend of mine/fellow AP music theory student/a middle school crush (no that had no part in this) asked me if I'd perform for a charity event.
In 2006 I'd done one for her church so she thought it'd be no problem to ask me if I'd do another one, and it wasn't!
I asked what it was for and she told me it was for the school's Environmental Club.
I honestly had no idea the school even had an Environmental Club, but I said "hey sure, you're a good person, I like helping the environment, and I know a lot of people have been really wanting to see me live since that crazy band fundraiser show I did where about 70 or more people freaked out, a mini-riot started, and a group of busty females threw money at my feet to encourage me to play more, so let's go for it!"
Now, I'm not a conceited person, nor do I think very highly of myself, but I think putting me on in the middle of the show and putting me rather small on the flyer was the first mistake of whoever was in charge of that part of the show:
Nothing you're unaware of, but generally, you put the most popular band on last so everyone stays, and generally, the band/artist that's actually from the place you're hosting the show has their own built-in following.... so with me being the not only most popular internationally and locally, and being the only one playing that night actually from the high school, don't you think it would have made sense to not only put me at the end of the night, but to also put me on the flyer a little bit bigger than other names instead of much smaller?
No matter, I let it go because I wasn't about to argue.
I was not used to having shows back then, I subconsciously like to self-sabotage, and it was a really really fucked up year... let's not go there, haha
-Flash forward to the date of the show-
Reader: Hey wait, what the, where is everyone? And where is that sound system?
Weird kid that lived on the stage: Oh, that show was a few days ago, you missed it *sweeps*
m@: Err... yeah, they kinda pushed the date forward without much warning to a weird night, so let's go to the actual date now
-Flash backward a few days to actual date of the show-
So, on a night earlier than scheduled; a night with several other events being hosted at the same time, the show went on.
Because I was the only one versed in live sound, I was assigned the task before my set to set things up for the band before me, The E_____ A______ [name protected because they are active again and they are friends of a friend... just know that they are known for being douche bags, play out of tune fake-emo, and the vocalist is a known rapist. Ironically, a friendly promoter in Albany told me they were just as dick to him when he booked them.]
The band came with no apparent knowledge of how live sound works, less equipment than they needed, and expected us to provide them things, and were not too nice about it.
Sorry champs, you're a bunch of high school dropouts with no apparent talent and if you act like entitled fucks, I'm not going to give you any respect.
Anyway, after putting up with rudeness, they played a miserable set of out of tune guitars, excessive use of the word "fuck" directed towards the sound, the band, and an audience the vocalist was apparently displeased with, and generic song writing (or well, they tried to re-create the supposed songs anyway) I was told it was my turn to play.
Now, I won't lie. I was on a lot of painkillers.
Between headache, stomach ache, nerves, and being a general mess of a person that year, I decided it wouldn't be a terrible thing to take three or four times more painkillers than I needed to for the show (I don't know dosages or anything, let's not get crazy here!)
Because older womens volleyball, a girl scouts meeting, and some teacher meeting were all not too into the idea of raucous music being played loud, I had to play a bit softer than usual:
Recipe for a bad Bubblegum Octopus show is any sound issue... volume, unpleasant clipping, weird mixing... volume is the biggest one though.
If I'm not encased in the sound, I don't really feel it as much.
It can feel goofy to jump about and do the weird things I often do when I'm not overwhelmed by the sounds.
Plus.. I was on a stage all alone (I was told I couldn't play on the floor and couldn't pull people on the stage,) not to mention a damn awkward kid in high school.... I don't think that's much of a secret either.
That covers why I wasn't so into that show and why I was miserable/out of it/etc.
Reader: What about the green? It's the most relevant and burning question in our minds!
m@: Well, that was just because it was the environmental club thing.
Nothing exciting.
Reader: What about the audio? You're totally just lip-synching, what a fake!
m@: You know, I've never known. Brian sent me the original cam rip and it was fine, but every time he uploaded it the audio wouldn't match up.
I like that people think I'm lip-synching though honestly. I hate anything that shows how dense people can be, but I also think it's amusing when I'm not in such a shitty mood.
Reader: Ok... Ok... Well, you didn't talk about... uh... uh.... well... WELL, YOU KNOW WHAT?!
m@: Okay, don't hurt yourself. Just breathe slowly, we're going to get through this together!
Let me just say this of the show:
In spite of how lame it was, there were moments of goodness that happened later in the show. That video was taken of the second song I played and my energy increased slightly once I saw how into it the crowd was getting.
I remember some girls (one of which is the girl God's Pink Laser was written about) spazzing out in a way I still to this day have not witnessed at a show, and I really wish people would do something similar, because it makes a lot more sense than anything else as far as I'm concerned.
There was one heckler, but I not only put him in his place, but he apparently didn't show up to school the next day because I embarrassed him so hard.
I don't often have to deal with heckling *knock on wood*, but NJ is a terrible place to play experimental music. And to be honest, he was just heckling me because he wanted me to play a song without giving myself a rest and explaining the song at all.
I used to actually talk about the songs instead of the strange and uncomfortable things I seem to always catch myself saying now.
Anyway, there you have it. One of the lamest shows I've played.
Actually, for humor's sake, let's make a list of the lamest shows in order and post their videos to humiliate me:
1. School of Rock in S. Hackensack, NJ w/ Bowling For Soup & MC Lars, Nov. 2009:
If the bands I was playing don't give away why I might hate myself for doing this (I did it for the lulz, really, but things got out of hand,) the mob of people old enough to know better heckling me because I wasn't Bowling For Soup would have.
If only I was on Warped Tour...
On the bright side, my fans almost got into a serious fight with the dissenters, I got to embarrass them by pointing out that they were waiting for Bowling For Soup to play, and a late 40s - mid 50s parent whose kid I taught in the summer music program happened to be there by coincidence and grabbed some heckler by the collar and told him "If you don't stop this shit I swear to god I'm going to take you outside and break your fucking neck." and meant it.
For the record, I would have absolutely shit myself if that guy did that to me.
2. Sun Radius in Traverse City MI with Yatagarasu and Dental Work, Aug. 2009:
The video was destroyed, thankfully.
In spite of the awesome bill, the sound was awful, the crowd was too high to move, even though they were supportive, and the place was massive, making it ultra awkward to be standing around in not-loud-enough-ness... not to mention, I stepped on my glasses that I brilliantly left on the floor while attempting to get more into my set.
It was a nice atmosphere aside from that. I always like to be with Chris, Casey, my favorite fan-girls from MI, Jay, and his girlfriend.
(Sadly, Yatagarasu's set also got fucked by electrical problems, only making the night worse. A shame my grandmother and parents had to see me live for the first time since that show in the High School at that show)
3. School Of Rock in S. Hackensack, NJ w/ Watchout[sic]! Theres[sic] Ghosts and pop punk bands (Apr. 2009)
This video also disappeared, much to my relief.
The bands were no good, the stage was uncomfortable, I hadn't gotten my live show groove back yet, and there were little boys with crooked hair in the back giving me the finger the whole time.
Also, my plan my friend Luke to have candy tossed at the audience turned into Luke whipping bubble gum projectiles at people who were not enjoying my set.
I can't even begin to explain this show
To top it off, I forgot that I had also left my beloved SM58 on stage and had to sit and watch as a crappy, generic fake emo/pop punk/bad post-hardcore band played a Linkin Park cover using it. I almost killed myself.
After the show, I went to get my money for the show, and some pudgy girl that looked to be in 8th grade asked me "SO WHAT WAS WITH THE [stuffed] OCTOPUS [that you had on stage]??"
*uberfacepalm.jpg*
On the bright side, I met Janelle, sold a bunch of CDs, and met Mike (Kamakaze Kitten)
I also got to sign a piece of notebook paper that was supposed to be a contract that showed I'd been compensated for the show.
(Where was that paper for the BFS show I wonder...)
4. Play N' Trade in Carytown VA with Yatagarasu, Beverage, and Inverse Phase (Aug. 2009)
A chiptune show that had excellent turn-out and decent sound for the small space. The problem? The neighbors decided that we were too loud and, as you can see, we were asked to turn down, leaving the end of my set at a volume so low I practically whispered over it.
5. The Fire(The Firehouse? I don't know anymore, some bar by an actual Fire House) in Philly PA with Yatagarasu, Cheap Dinos, and The Megas. (Aug. 2009)
I don't know where the video went, maybe it exists somewhere.
All I know is that at any given moment I was playing for anywhere between 2 - 11 people.
To make the show worse, they decided to have the open mic AFTER the actual show, instead of having it before to bring people in for the show, so we were outdone in attendance by very amateur and childish hip-hop (I counted over 30 uses of the word nigger in 2 minutes) "funny" folk music, and other run-of-the-mill open mic night occurrences.
Did I mention we had no place to stay and had to drive to Baltimore at 3AM to stay in some blown-out looking building? Life, maaan
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Alright, there you go.
Embarrassments galore.
Coming next time:
Less embarrassing things.
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